David was a man of many talents,  the biggest of which was making people laugh,  but he was also pretty good at impersonations.  One that he used to do whenever either of us was about to do something difficult,  was Andy Murray when he was interviewed straight after losing his first Wimbledon final and his first words, whilst choking back tears were 'this is not going to be easy '. Well ditto Andy Murray right now. 

Another memory that's resonating with me now relates to our wedding day.  We got married in St Lucia and as David was waiting for me to arrive, the registrar said to him several times 'be brave David '. We laughed about why the registrar thought he needed to be brave marrying me but right now I can hear him repeating both of those - and I know that this is not going to be easy and I need to be brave for David- so please bare with me if I get overcome with emotion at any point. I know that funerals by their very nature are sad occasions but I  really want this to be a tribute to David and in the spirit of how he lived his life. 

"Not, how did he die, but how did he live? Not what did he gain,  but what did he give? These are the units to measure the worth of a man."

How very true those words are. I have so many of my own stories about the love and the laughter that David brought to my life and I know that so many of you here will have your own special memories. Lots of mine aren't suitable for public consumption and would probably lose something in the telling,  that special something that David uniquely brought to them.

What I want to do is read some of the messages David received when he left probation a couple of months ago and some that have been sent in the last few weeks,  because I think they beautifully sum up the man that he was. I hope those of you who wrote them don't mind me sharing them but there are some people here,  like David's mum and dad, who aren't on Facebook so won't have seen them and I think it would be lovely for them to hear how loved he was.  And just so you're aware, David had a very creative mind and came up with lots of different characters that he brought to life so when I mention Lord Melbury in a minute,  I haven't got confused,  that is David (just as an aside,  another fabulous character he created was 'man in the bath '. When the children were younger I remember on more than one occasion, the 3 of us, me Alex and Portia,  sitting in a row with the bathroom door open while David was in the bath,  regaling us with stories about ‘man in the bath’. ‘Man in the bath’ even had his own theme tune. I realise that won't mean anything to those of you who weren't there and it's not really one of those occasions when I can say 'you had to be there ' and really mean it, because to be honest it would have been just a little but weird if you had been there.  Anyway,  here are the messages:

'I'm glad that I told him he was the best Boss I've ever had in my long working life. We on the Maidenhead Team loved Lord Melbury and what was wonderful is that we knew he loved us too. I have so many happy memories of his antics around the office and us trying to keep a straight face when someone would appear wondering why there was so much laughter. We would all have done anything for M. Anything. He was truly the best. I shall miss his kindness and most of all his sense of humour'

I just want to add at this point that you're right Lesley,  David loved that time working in the IOM team and it was possibly the happiest period of his career.  Although a lot of his time in probation was spent doing partnership work where he excelled due to his strategic thinking,  I think he thrived best when he was in a team where he could bounce off other people. I remember during that time, once the team had moved to Slough, he encouraged you all to play a game each week based on the catchphrases they came up with on the tv programme 'Take Me Out ' such as 'let the hanky see the panky' and  'Let the chimney see the sweep ' where you came up with your own hilarious ones.  I remember him telling me about one particularly risque one he came up with that had me crying with laughter. Those of you who were there will no doubt remember the one I'm referring to. It was also during that time in Slough that David used to sneak off to the omelette place  for long lunches with Rekha and Jackie.  I'm pretty sure Rekha was the instigator but David would have been a willing participant.  I think they possible spent more time in the kitchen or the omelette place than they did in their offices!

Back to the messages: 

'He was a great boss and a fantastic ambassador for the service. He supported us all every step of the way and his sense of humour was very much appreciated by “us rebel’s”.

'The best boss ever '

'You were one of the best and entertaining to work for/with. '

'Another good man gone way too soon.   The only manager ever who has decided to let me run free and professionally grow in my own way, trusting that I probably knew what I was doing. No red tape, no nonsense  just age old interventions that work with real people. Thanks for all the jokes along the way and your way of looking at everything in a slightly different light. Will really miss you. Xxx'

'U r a bloody legend x great support encouragement and laughter x'

'I just want to thank you for being incredibly supportive during a really stressful period of my life. I know that I wouldn’t have been able to come back to work without your support. I will always remember that. You will be truly missed by so many. I thoroughly enjoyed working for you. A total character who always said it how it is '

'You made me laugh so much. Remembering the days in the High Wycombe office - happy days.'

'You lifted my spirits when times were tough and you were a joy to work with.  I remember the days when laughter was the norm when you were in the building.  Your sense of humour was infectious and I often left the office feeling exhausted having laughed so much during the day.' (I think it's safe to say Avril had to invest in some tena lady during the time she was working with David)

Catherine,  I'm sorry that David never got to wear that rhinestone Elvis costume for you or visit Graceland with you.    It was right up there at the top of his list of things he wanted to do ( the Graceland bit more so than wearing the costume for you,  I think!).

There's a common theme here of the laughter and joy David brought to many people's lives.  He had a very naughty sense of humour that was sometimes just a little bit inappropriate and irreverent but he had the wit and the charm to get away with it.  But there was also a more serious  side to David. He was a complex character with many hidden depths and he had his fair share of heartbreak and sorrow.  He felt things very deeply and was actually a very sensitive soul.  Most of you will know that for many years David suffered from a degenerative spinal problem.  He was in a lot of pain for a long time so the fact that he was still able to give so much to so many people despite this says a huge amount about the man he was. 

Before his back got too painful,  I used to regularly wake up to find David dancing across the bedroom floor, backward dancing was his specialty and we had a running joke about him popping up on serious tv debates or news stories,  just backward dancing in his underpants across the screen behind the presenter, so I have this vision of him now,  backward dancing behind me in his underpants, hoping to give you all one last laugh.

So,  not only was he hilariously funny,  he was great company,  intelligent and quick witted and could hold his own in any conversation.  He didn't take life too seriously and if any of you ever sat in a meeting with him,  you'll know exactly what I mean. There's one thing you can say about life with David Walls - it was never boring and was sometimes a bit of a roller coaster but it's a ride that I never wanted to get off. 

Now I want to read Death is Nothing at all by Henry Scott -Holland. I read this at my mum's funeral and it gave me great comfort then so I hope it will give comfort to those of you who need it now. 

Death is nothing at all. 

It does not count. 

I have only slipped away into the next room. 

Nothing has happened. 

Everything remains exactly as it was. 

I am I, and you are you, 

and the old life that we lived so fondly together is untouched, unchanged. 

Whatever we were to each other, that we are still. 

Call me by the old familiar name. 

Speak of me in the easy way which you always used. 

Put no difference into your tone. 

Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow. 

Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes that we enjoyed together.

Play, smile, think of me, pray for me. 

Let my name be ever the household word that it always was. 

Let it be spoken without an effort, without the ghost of a shadow upon it. 

Life means all that it ever meant. 

It is the same as it ever was. 

There is absolute and unbroken continuity. 

What is this death but a negligible accident? 

Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight? 

I am but waiting for you, for an interval, 

somewhere very near, 

just round the corner. 

All is well. 

Nothing is hurt; nothing is lost. 

One brief moment and all will be as it was before. 

How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting when we meet again!

I'm conscious that I'm in danger of turning into the Bishop at the royal wedding and if I don't stop soon you'll be giving each other sideways glances and praying that I wrap things up but I started by jotting down a couple of things I wanted to say but everyday it got a little bit longer.  So I  just have one more thing to say.

David was a massive lover of dogs and would happily have filled the house with them.  About a year ago we lost Mac,  brother of Milli and not long after that Daisy came into our life by virtue of my lovely friend Anna.  Daisy was the greatest gift that Anna could have given us and at the time David said that she had been sent to us by Mac to keep Milli company.  But the truth is,  she kept David company. He unfortunately spent a lot of time at home last year because of his bad back and having Daisy with him was such a blessing - when I came in from work his face would light up as he told me what Daisy had been getting up to and what new tricks he'd been teaching her that day.  So in the same way that David believed that Daisy had been sent to us,  so I believe there is a reason why David has been taken from us so soon, we just might not know or understand what that reason is right now.

So all we can do is keep sharing our memories of David and laughing at the madness that he brought to our world and in the words of that great man himself  "keep calm and carry on"

Charlie Walls

12.06.2018